If you’re not clear on the difference between criticism and feedback, you could be missing out on your best coaching and developmental opportunities. I’m going to illustrate how this happens by sharing a particularly cringe-worthy error from my past but first let’s define what we’re talking about.
The Difference Between Criticism and Feedback
Criticism is easy to identify when you’re on the receiving end. Nobody likes it. It makes us feel bad — like we missed the mark. We blew it. On the other hand, feedback usually makes us feel better, more hopeful. We’re ready to try again. What differentiates the two? Read more
Most New Year’s resolutions start out with fiery ambition on January 1 but soon dwindle to a weak flame, easily extinguished by the demands of day-to-day life.
Sound familiar? It should. According to StatisticBrain only 8% of people successfully achieve their resolution. I wonder how many of those abandoned goals cause angst. Especially after having publicly proclaimed a determination to lose weight or stop smoking or get a new job.
Is it lack of willpower—or something else?
Willpower is necessary, that’s for sure. Especially if one is aiming at a significant behavioural change like zapping an addiction to nicotine. New habits take anywhere from 30 days to 6 months before they become ingrained which means there’s a period of time when our mind and body send us signals to tempt us into the old behaviour. Willpower is our ability to withstand the temptation until such time as it loses its hold on us.
But lack of willpower isn’t the main reason so many goals are dropped. There are two other causes that I think are more pervasive. Fortunately they’re easily remedied once you recognize them. Read more
Ever notice how negative events effortlessly pop up into your consciousness while the positive ones require digging and cobweb clearing? That’s happened to you, right? Good, it’s not just me. Actually, I know I’m not alone in this—apparently our brains are hard-wired to turn scary or uncomfortable moments into permanent memories. It’s part of an age-old survival mechanism that equates discomfort with danger and assigns these memories as high priority.
Here’s the good news. Just because there’s science behind it, doesn’t mean we have to settle for the way things are. We can reverse this natural tendency by Read more
Are you the diligent perfectionist who double checks every detail, or are you the passionate creative person who comes up with the big ideas? This simple quiz allows you to describe your work ethic, and identifies your office personality using the answers you provide.
What Is Your Office Personality will ask you questions about how you solve problems, what you do in your free time, and how you handle decisions and criticism. It only takes a few minutes to complete. Sharing the results would make a fun way to start a team meeting.
I was a five-year old in pigtails, standing on an elm-lined sidewalk with my grandfather, staring at what I thought was the most marvelous toy on the planet. Grandpa had just pulled a kid-sized pedal car out of his basement and had placed it on the sidewalk — for me! I was beside myself. Read more
When autumn arrives, many of us are compelled to break away from the daily grind just long enough to appreciate the beauty of trees. The next time you do that, think about the people who try your patience—the ones you just can’t bring yourself to love—and see if this quote from Ram Dass softens the way you see them. Read more
Self-image matters. We all know this. And so often our self-image is one that does not support us to become all of who we are. Particularly when we are looking for a new job or a change of career.
I am what I think. My thoughts shape my world. Yours do too. What you think about yourself and the world around you shapes your life. Those thoughts shape how you come over in your CV, applications and interviews. I can’t be the only one who looks back on some of mine and cringes!
So here’s my metaphor for reshaping your thoughts. Read more